Sunday, July 6, 2014


5 weeks since I last posted. Sorry if anybody reading this has been worried or thinking the worst has happened. It hasn't! I am still preggers!

I was discharged at 28 weeks on 19th June. What a wonderful day it was. It is difficult to say how good it is to be home. It has relieved a lot of the pressure on the rest of the family. I thought that I would be uneasy about it but I have been OK. James is probably the happiest of us all.

Before I was let out I had another 2 shots of celestone - the steroids that help Hope's lungs, brain and gut in case of premmie birth. I had the same reaction as with the first round at 24 weeks, very hot and flushed face although no temperature or other symptoms at all.

I had 10 days at home before needing to report back to the hospital on 1st July for a scan and appointment with OBGYN. While waiting for the scan I had a mild anxiety attack - racing heart, chest pain, dry mouth, wanting to flee! I was able to control that one with some mind exercises and breathing techniques. We went in for the scan and they always do the tummy scan first, to make sure everything is OK (AKA baby still alive). I was sure Hope was fine as I'd been feeling her move all morning but it seems to be protocol. I was super anxious about the internal one, the one that would show the integrity of my cervix. Not sure why I felt so worked up about this one. I know that medically if she was to be born now Hope has a great fighting chance of being 100% fine, much more so than in previous scans. Worried about being put back in hospital? Yes. Worried that I had been doing too much at home? Yes.

And so I couldn't breathe. Became very hot and sweaty. Felt like I was going to be sick. And worst of all the busy brain feeling I used to get with anxiety attacks when James was tiny. We had to stop the whole thing, I was turned on my left side and ordered to breathe! The girl doing the U/S kindly offered to get the internal out of the way and come back to the rest of the scan!

What ho! My cervix was stable. No change. Great! What a relief! Back to the measurements. She is bang on track, still being little Miss Average in all things. Apart from my cervical issues the pregnancy is a healthy one. Phew!

I saw a friend for the first time since before going into hospital. He asked me how long to go? I had to really think on it. My brain is so rained to keeping this baby in that counting down to get her out hasn't registered. I got all flustered and didn't quite know the right answer. The true answer of course is 10 weeks to take me to full term. My/our reality is more like 5-6 weeks when the stitches come out but she could come any time from 4 weeks.....
Dr B found nothing to be worried about, took my BP (low but fine) and told me to go do the gestational diabetes test (fine) and to have an Anti D shot in my butt (barely felt it - what's the matter with me?) with the next one at 36 weeks if we get that far. Next appointment with Dr K 15th July...

I promised myself a hairdo if I get to 32 weeks so have made an appointment for 17th July. I am so looking forward to it

We had a very very busy weekend with visitors coming and going all weekend. By last night I was feeling quite sore from all the sitting I'd been doing. After a good nights sleep (HA!) I am feeling much better. And ready for much resting today. Andy has gone to PNG again, for the week - it was either go now or later and the risk of being away when the baby comes. I wish he didn't have to go at all.

I will try to be a better blogger. But hey, life gets in the way sometimes....